i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
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