Swine flu. Run for my life!
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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