One girl and one boy is just not enough.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Randomize
