Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize