Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
