i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
