guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
