did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
