Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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