Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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