How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
