i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
