PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
