i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize