So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
