Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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