I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
