I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
A bitchslap is in order.
Randomize
