Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
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His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
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