very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Help. Why am I so naked?
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