You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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