Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
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