party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
