How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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