There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
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So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
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if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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