mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
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