When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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