so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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