We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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