i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
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