the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Randomize
