yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
