i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
