You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
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