I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
if only i could text you this smell
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
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He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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