dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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