Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
