shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Randomize
