the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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