we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
