so that wasnt chicken after all
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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