i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't deserve a penis
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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