3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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