have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
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