It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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