How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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