4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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