I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
tell your sister to shave her snatch
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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