did you get engaged???
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Randomize
