porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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