Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Define "chronic" masturbator.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize